Thoughts about three desires
The past few weeks have been tricky.
It seems like the world around me has been in limbo.
Nothing seems to be happening for what felt like an eternity. It has been a challenge to get out of bed on some days, let alone get anything productive done.
Thankfully, there are early signs of things beginning to shift at least when it comes to my work. There seems to be some fresh energy in this 9th month of the year. I felt drawn to voicing certain internal desires as I sat down to write today.
I ended up writing a few thoughts about the current dominant desires in my psyche. It felt weird about writing them because I felt they have always been present, just not acknowledged loud.
So, here are a few thoughts about three desires:
1. Deep desire to get unstuck and transform
There is a growing voice in my head that seems to be saying,
“It is time now. Your hermit phase is over. It is time to start taking action. You cannot stay stuck forever. Life needs you.”
It is not the first time I have had these thoughts. So, I am a bit skeptical.
But, something feels different this time.
There is a sense of gentleness in the nudge instead of the usual critical internal judgy voice.
2. Desire for a deeper purpose and vision
Most of my past attempts to create a positive change have failed. I feel that one of the biggest reasons is they were not centered around a core vision or purpose.
I am aware that not all positive changes, for example, small habits like meditation or exercising, have to be grounded in a central purpose. Sometimes, the act of doing those things becomes the purpose in itself.
But, I feel that this time I do need one to create a lasting change rooted in self-compassion and love.
3. Behind the desire to love selflessly/to find love
I have framed this thought differently than the other two. Initially, it was just the desire to love someone selflessly.
But, something within me nudged me to explore the “why” behind this particular desire.
This is because I have always approached the idea of love from a selfless angle. I have always believed in the idea of letting go as the true test of my feelings for anyone.
It sometimes makes me wonder that behind the desire to love selflessly is just a simple desire to accept and love myself unconditionally. I know it sounds very cliched’ and ‘feel-goody’ but it is what it is.
Unless I cannot become the person I can love and accept, maybe I’ll always struggle with finding love. Behind the desire to find and experience falling in love is just the call to love the person in the mirror.
Again, it is not the first time I have had this thought.
But, this time it has hit me differently.
Anyway, that is all from me this week, folks!
If anything resonated with you, do share your thoughts by replying to this email!
Until next time,