Crushes, compatibility, love
Today I want to introduce you to one of my favorite online writers at present, Isabel.
Here are 3 ideas from her essays that caught my attention recently:
1. Crushes are misplaced ambition
When she says ambition, she does not mean ambition in the traditional sense of status, career, or money. The ambition can be just an “aspiration to be excellent” at anything.
She says that we often crush on someone because they possess qualities we wish to see in ourselves.
“If you don’t think you know what you want, or where you want to go, or what you want to do, or what you want to be more of, just look at your crushes: What do they all have in common that makes you want them?”
I think that is a great question to reflect on if you feel confused about your true values and deeper ambition.
2. Compatibility is a matter of inner exploration
Isabel says that every person has a “certain number of “layers of depth” to them”. These layers indicate the depth of their self-knowledge and understanding.
Two people are compatible on a soul level when they have the same number of layers indicating they know themselves equally. It is almost as if like the tentacles in the blue aliens of Avatar fuse together with similar tentacles.
“When you connect with someone on one of those layers—your tentacles fuse. You get to know each other on a soul-level.”
She suggests three questions to determine if you’d be compatible on a soul level:
- are you equally open?
- are you equally interested in each other?
- are you equally interested in yourselves?
3. Letting yourself be loved is a prerequisite to being loved
This one is my favorite of all three ideas as I have been pondering and reflecting on similar themes in my personal life. Isabel says that one of the biggest reasons why relationships don’t work out is the “unwillingness for one or both partners to simply let themselves be loved.”
When we look at ourselves honestly, we enable ourselves to reveal who we are to others with that same level of openness and truth. When we accept ourselves and love ourselves for every part of our being, we allow others to do the same.
It is a challenging idea to grasp but important to reflect on.
This is also where the importance of inner work and self-understanding comes into play because unless you are aware of the shadow and unloving parts of yourself, they will keep you from receiving acceptance and love from anyone.
Only when we can see and accept ourselves as we truly are, we open the doors to love.
It is like clearing the windows of our hearts with non-judgmental awareness and kindness to let the light of love enter and fill our entire being.
That’s all from me this week, folks!
Until next time,